Negativity is a conditioned state of mind

It is not my way of Being to talk about negativity but I feel it warrants deep reflection and why this state of negative thinking and emotions are so prevalent in our lives. It is the recognition of what is.

All the cultures and all the religions have been conditioning us to feel negative about ourselves. Nobody is loved, appreciated, for just being himself or herself. We are asked to prove whether we are of any worth: ‘Bring gold medals from the university! Get First-Class Honors! Achieve success, money, power, prestige, respectability! Prove!’ Our worth is not intrinsic; that’s what has been taught to us. Our worth has to be proved. Almost everywhere we go in life, there appears to be a relentless need to ‘prove something to some people’, and sometimes in the company of close friends and family, negativity prevails.

Everybody is feeling negative about himself, because that’s how he has been made to feel. Our parents have done it to us – this is a heritage, a great heritage. Our teachers have done it to us, our priests have done it to us, our political leaders have done it to us – and so many people are doing it that, naturally, we have become impressed by the very idea that we are worthless, that we don’t have any intrinsic meaning or value, that we don’t have any significance of our own.

Each parent is saying to the child, to each child, ‘Prove that you have some worth.’ Being, just being, is not enough – some doing is needed.

OSHO shared: “My whole approach is that being is intrinsically valuable. Just that you are is such a gift from existence, what more can you ask for? Just to breathe in this beautiful existence is certificate enough that existence loves you, that existence needs you; otherwise you would not be here. You are; existence has given birth to you. There must have been an immense need – you have filled a gap. Without you existence would be less. And when I say this, I am saying it not only to you: I am saying to the trees, to the birds, to the animals, to the pebbles on the shore. A single pebble less on the immense seashore and the seashore would not be the same. A single flower less and the universe would miss it.

We have to learn that we are valuable as we are. It is not about the ego – just the contrary. In the feeling that we are valuable as we are, we will also feel others are valuable as they are. Accept people as they are; drop shoulds, oughts – those are enemies. And when we carry so many shoulds: ‘Do this and don’t do that!’, we cannot dance; the burden is too heavy. And when we have been given too many ideals and goals – ideals of perfection which as utterly impossible – that we will always feel we are falling short.

All that we need is to be creative, loving, aware, meditative…if we feel poetry arising in us, write it for ourselves, for our lovers, for our children, for our friends…and forget all about it. Sing it, and if nobody listens, sing it alone and enjoy it. Go to the trees and they will applaud and appreciate it. Or talk to the birds and the animals, and they will understand far more than mankind who have been for centuries…missed out on the real deal in life!

BE who we want to be…and loving it!

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